The impatient baker that I am, fed up with the silly oddessy to find cupcake cups, I threw my hands up in the air with resignation of finding cupcake baking pans. This shouldn’t be this difficult! These sorts of things are supposed to be easily found! This
fucking island is bass ackwards, I swear. Since I’m waiting on a certain hunk to accept my offer of being a near mail order bride in order to get off this place, I guess I have to make do with what I have on hand. Even if I have to overuse my precious cupcake liners and pull out some random pans in order to complete the challenge. Cupcake Hero should just give me an honorary prize for being the most persistent through adversity.
But, just in case my experiment went wrong, I decided to whip up a batch of Drunken Zombie Cupcakes. There was no way in heck I was going to endanger my precious Island Passion Cupcakes in some cockamanee experiment. So, the little zombies were just going to have to bravely be my guinea pigs. I can hear y’all gasping in horror. No! She couldn’t have done those cupcakes without a pan! Is she NUTS?! Well, why yes… yes, I am. I would say a decade living on the island has made me bass ackwards too. Or… at the very least,
Ha! There is a god and he/she/it was watching my cupcakes.
They kinda look like biscuits in that picture, don’t they?
Drunken Zombie Cupcakes Makes 12 dozen
- 1/2 cup butter-flavored shortening (like heck I was gonna use my precious butter on this when it could go horribly wrong!)
- 3/4 cup sugar
- 3 teaspoons Passoa
- 3 eggs
- 1 teaspoon orange extract
- 1 cup self-rising flour
- 1/6 cup Zombie
Cream the shortening with the sugar and the Passoa. Beat in one egg at a time.
Mix in extract and Zombie. Sift in flour.
Bake at 350F for 20 minutes.
I made the Orange Passion Buttercream into a glaze by adding a tablespoon of Zombie. (At least I’m going to call it a glaze because my hand slipped in pouring the additional liquid and therefore came out more runny than I would have liked. However, I could have fixed it with the addition of more powdered sugar. I was not willing to spend so much energy since I was remaking the buttercream for my darling passionate cupcakes that were baking as I worked.)
Final review: Pay no attention to the maniacally laughing woman who is pleased as punch for having successfully made cupcakes against all odds. I was quite happy with my little zombies, more than I thought since I made them fully expecting them to fail. They didn’t taste so great fresh out of the oven but I had to try them anyway. My housemate tried the final frosted cupcake and loved them. He said that the glaze worked well to counteract the balance of the light cake. No, he really didn’t say precisely that, but that’s my interpretation of what he said… so you’re just going to have to live with that. The alcohol got baked off and the frosting didn’t seem boozy at all. No taste like fruit loops here. Overall, a wonderful success. I found that it’s easier to bake them if they are more spaced apart and the cups don’t get filled too much. There was at least one prettily round cupcake. I was actually very fond of the square ones. These I’m essentially giving them away and moving on to my next endeavor.